If you’re looking for an educational listen that is fascinating, then check out The Knowledge Project by Shane Parrish. He has all sorts of incredible guests on the show, and dives into a plethora of interesting and important topics.
For example, he recently interviewed Dr. Sue Johnson. She’s the author of several books, including Hold Me Tight – a book on relationships that I’m super eager to read now. I’ve put it on hold on my Libby app (audio & books from the Vancouver Public Library – if you don’t have the app I highly suggest you get it!). There’s a big demand for it understandably, so I may have to wait a bit!
But that’s what’s great about podcasts, you learn a lot without having to read the book.
For starters, did you know that our culture touches the least out of all cultures? Yet humans crave touch, and thrive off it, according to Johnson. Next time you see an Italian family, be aware of how much they touch. It’s actually quite striking how different it is to the typical North American family. As a mama to be it makes me realize I want to be more aware of that with my own child. I will be.
Dr. Johnson also thinks we should teach relationships in schools, and I agree. Along with how to handle finances and figure out what you want in life, relationships are so important, yet they get ignored in the curriculum. Why don’t we teach communication skills in school?
Key in the podcast interview is their discussion about how to be more emotionally responsive in your relationships. How to tune in emotionally to how your partner is feeling, and be able to respond in a way that makes them feel like they matter. It’s important stuff. Things like being able to say to your partner, “Did I hurt your feelings? I think I did, I’m so sorry.” That’s not easy to do when you’re in a fight. But it’s important.
Or showing support for someone who’s going through a tough time, when you want to help them but don’t know what to do or say, “I see that you’re hurting, and I don’t really understand it but I don’t want you to be alone. I want to be with you and I don’t know what to do.”
They give a lot of great snippets like this throughout the interview, as well as chat about three things in research that predict how safe a bond will be (in any relationship, of any two people, at any age). They are accessibility, responsiveness, & engagement. Dr. Johnson stresses that secrets and deception are toxic for relationships and greatly impact the level of accessibility in a bond. So be open and honest with your partner.
Dr. Johnson focuses on emotional freedom therapy, or EFT, which has shown good results in helping people. For more info you can check out her work here.
And you can listen to the podcast interview with Dr. Sue Johnson here. Let me know what you think!